< DISCLAIMER: These are things in my head, don't take them too seriously. Bear in mind that, actually, I have no idea what I am saying.

To Meet a Ada^

I have this crazy goal. So crazy that I think I just went mental.

And the physics is not the hard part to solve but rather humans, how to take humanity the next level and also be prepared for it... how?

And I have the crazy feeling that I won't solve any of the issues that goal presents. For obvious reason (I'm not smart) but the crazy feeling is that I'll be meeting the modern Ada Lovelace.

Where?... How?... No fucking idea. It's just a feeling. A crazy feeling. And she will be the one who solves all my issues.

Owning your Failures^

Just like history is written by the winners, I think the whole achievements thing is also the same. We hear about this and that and how great. But rarely we hear about the failures. We hear about failures when it comes to shame someone or to feel superior.

That made me think that we are not teaching how to own your mistakes and failures. It took many years to finally start talking about them openly like it was nothing. It's weird, don't you think? After all, we learn by failing.

Imagine doing that in job interviews? I did, just a couple of times. And as you probably expected, it wasn't a good thing. I mean, it wasn't seen as a good thing by the interviewer. I was totally fine with it.

So, yeah. I'll be owning my mistakes and failures instead of having metals and awards, not that I have any but still.


In these turbulent times, I can't help to feel deceived.

It's nobody's fault. I don't think that anyone has deceived humanity with bad intentions.

Here I am listening to Kate Bush's Cloudbusting... and It makes me feel... It reminds me to that moment when I learnt that adults are fallible. How fragile humanity is.

This is the moment when I wish there were gods and goddesses. Aliens, if you will. Someone who could save us from our childish behavior and premature use of technology.

And yet I just know that something good is gonna happen.

Make a meaningful living^

Tomorrow it's my 37 Sun cycle which it's only special to me and probably my mom.

Like any other human being or sentient being, I broke some many bubbles so far. So many illusions we have created as a civilization. A civilization being one of them. Gosh. So many lies.

However, I think that in a reality without meaning, you have the power and responsibility (if you want to be sane) to create your own meaningful way of living.

In my case, it sums to the following GIF I made.

I'll be a living god

I'm not smart^

Like any developer, I have done a lot of interviews. The interviews are a bit diff, I think, since I have no computer science degree. I'm a physicist by training. Some people may think that probably means I'm smart. I am not.

One of the things I learned as a child was that I'm not smart. I'm not wise. I'm not intelligent. There is nothing special about me and there are far more better people than me in any area. I forced myself to live with that. It's hard since family and friends say otherwise but that, I believe, does not help me at all.

At my age, I've learned to live with that. It's sort of sad since I know I'll be behind. I'll be left behind. It's hard to accept that but I'm ok with the logic of how Nature/Reality seems to work.

I recently had to decline to continue with a process with a company because its process involved challenges like the ones you have at Facebook, Amazon, Google, Microsoft, you name it. They also wanted to know how much time it took me to solve the problem. To me, the company wanted the best of the best which, well, I am not.

I could have fake it. Nowadays, you can find anything on the internet and I'm positive I could have found the solution. To what end? I'm not smart. Cheating won't make me smart, I think. It was not even about being honest. I think I would cheat if along the way I got smart but I really doubted that's the case.

I like to believe that what I have cultivated is that for most things I don't need to be smart, I just have to be careful. I doubt I'm the best but I do think I best myself every day.

Script Tag, Programmatically^

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